If you ever want to know what your biggest imperfection is let a little kid draw...– Kacey Murphy
People say I’m extravagant because I want to be surrounded by beauty. But tell...– Imelda Marcos
Unable to go anywhere, the girls travelled in their imaginations to Siamese...– The Virgin Suicides
“My first glimpse of the flat black streets of Chicago depressed and dismayed me, mocked all my fantasies. Chicago seemed an unreal city whose mythical houses were built of slabs of black coal wreathed in palls of gray smoke, houses whose foundations were sinking slowly into the dank prairie. Flashes of steam showed intermittently on the wide horizon, gleaming translucently in the winter...
It’s days like these that call for staying in my room wearing just my favorite underwear and hoodie, playing Left4Dead and watching hulu.
Dear Music Guy, How are your music classes going? I’m the guy who sat in front of you in Music Appreciation last semester; I’ve never been so self-conscience about how the back of my head looked before. But I don’t see you that much anymore. I get to hear you an awful lot though; I have a voice lesson right after yours and I have to wait outside the door, so sometimes I get to...
Things they don't tell you (but should). A Guide... →
The average pencil is seven inches long, with just a half-inch eraser - in case...– Robert Brault
Playground Love by Air I’m a high school...
The Chairman’s Waltz - John Williams
Dear Bike Guy, Que pasa, dude? Again, we sat around each other outside the Nest today. I love almost speaking to you everyday (that sentence works with or without sarcasm). I’ve been pretty adamant about making sure you don’t see me looking at you, cause that’s weird. But there are so many questions I have for you, like, where did you get your bicycle and why don’t you...
An Ode to Waffle House
Never mind the waffles themselves. The American South’s homogeneous, twenty-four-hour homage to breakfast has a place for us all. My gripe with the American South is not with its alleged peculiarity, but rather its homogeneity — its smug boosterism, its passive-aggressive encoding of “good manners,” its landscapes parched and blasted by Christian surrender to corporate...
People who sit in the disability seats when I'm... →
A photographer went to a socialite party in New York. As he entered the front...– Sam Haskins
So I was at work last night (I ref volleyball games) and watching the ladies play got me thinking. I’ve always loved this sport not only because I love to play it but because I learned so much from it. I started playing during that time of your teenage years where you really figure out what kind of person you are. My coach, Coach Blieler, who doubled as my history teacher, not only taught us...
I like an escalator because an escalator can never break, it can only become...– Mitch Hedberg
My favorite brand of yogurt is Yoplait; I can’t think of very many days where I don’t have at least one. But the thing that always crosses my mind about yoplait and yogurt in general is the little bit that’s left when you’re done. Yoplait has that little inward lip on its cups where you have to perform what I like to call “ring scrape”. You know, sometimes I...
I personally love it, but I read some scathing...
Santa isn’t coming. It’s up to you.– Joey Comeau
So everyone knows that I like to build things and when I do it’s often under the mentality that “bigger is usually better”. Everyone also knows that I like animals, symbolism in different cultures, and… poles (insert gay joke here). So what better things to build than totem poles? I’ve started sketching stuff and I hope this can be something I can do for real. I want...
Cool Illustrations by Jake Wallace →
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
What about little microphones? What if everyone swallowed them, and they played the sounds of our hearts through little speakers, which could be in the pouches of our overalls? When you skateboard down the street you could hear everyone’s heartbeat, and they could hear yours, sort of like sonar. One weird things is, I wonder if everyone’s hearts would start to beat at the same time,...